Captain. Strong. Brave. Admire
her action figure.
| Ok, this isn't really an original idea. I saw it on another site. But it is so much fun! These reviews were written by me or friends of mine, but if anyone reading this gets inspired and wants to submit some reviews for consideration, see the bottom of the page for my submission guidelines. |
| Alien |
| Ripley fights the beast. Captain. Strong. Brave. Admire her action figure. |
| by bellamy |
| Alien on |
| AntiTrust |
| Did you see this one back when it was called "Hackers"? Hi-tech thriller fun. |
| by Rachel |
AntiTrust on or on  |
| Apocalypse Now |
| Up the river to the heart of darkness of soul. Don't get off the boat. |
| by bellamy |
| Apocalypse Now on or on |
| Ash Tuesday |
| Small tales of New York People learn to recover Heartwarming but dull |
| by Rachel |
Ash Tuesday on or on  |
| Bounce |
| While watching "Benyth" you play "What's acting, what's real?" Not quite worth the hype. |
| by Rachel |
| Bounce on or on |
| Bread & Tulips |
| It's so well-crafted A wife's self-discovery Worth the subtitles! |
| by Rachel |
| Bread & Tulips on |
| Bringing Rain |
| What's it all about? Subtext that's left too obscure I thought he had died |
| by Rachel |
| Bringing Rain on or on |
| Bulletproof Monk |
| Chow Yun Fat smiles sweet, kicks ass with his flying feet. Wisdom? No! Great fun. |
| by bellamy |
| Bulletproof Monk on |
| Catch That Girl (Klatretøsen) |
| Will this delightful Ocean's Eleven for kids Spur a tween crime spree? |
| by Rachel |
| Catch That Girl on or on |
| Chinese Odyssey 2002 |
| What's old made new Under the peach blossom tree Silly and magic |
| by Rachel |
| Chinese Odyssey 2002 on or on |
| Cinemania |
| Think you're a film nut? Five New Yorkers can top that They live celluloid |
| by Rachel |
| Cinemania on or on |
| Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon |
| Beauty and magic This martial arts adventure makes the spirit fly |
| by Rachel |
| Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon on or on |
| Darkness Falls |
| In light is safety. But this muddled mass of tripe lends little brightness. |
| by bellamy |
| Darkness Falls on |
| Donnie Darko |
| Spooky or insane? The future eats its own tail hide, giggle, wonder. |
| by Rachel |
| Donnie Darko on or on |
| Dude, Where's my Car? |
| Love the bubble suits Bill and Ted for a new age Some stupid, good fun |
| by Rachel |
| Dude, Where's my Car? on or on |
| The Eyes of Tammy Faye |
| Can you forgive her? Ex-controversy "victim" Mascara still flows |
| by Rachel |
| Eyes of Tammy Faye on or on |
| Fight Club |
| Very clever film. "How's that working out for you?" I've seen it four times. |
| by Rachel |
| Fight Club on or on |
| Film ist. (7-12) |
| Historic film clips layered together, set to unbearable sound |
| by Rachel |
| Film ist. (7-12) on or on |
| Fishing with John |
| "Lon the fisherman has wooden legs -- but real feet." Dry humor, wet fish. |
| by bellamy |
| Fishing with John on or on |
| The Full Monty |
| Working stiffs, daring nakedness to make a buck. Fun for the ladies! |
| by bellamy |
| The Full Monty on |
| Galaxy Quest |
| Shooting fish? Perhaps. But -- poking fun is O.K. when done out of love. |
| by bellamy |
| Galaxy Quest on or on |
| The Ghost and Mrs. Muir |
| The sea captain's ghost. The lovely lonely widow. Romance by the sea. |
| by bellamy |
| The Ghost and Mrs. Muir on |
| Ghost Dog |
| Forest Whitaker lives by code of samuri RZA keeps it real |
| by Joe |
| Ghost Dog on or on |
| Ghost World |
| Weirdos everywhere will see themselves reflected. Comix brought to life. |
| by Rachel |
| Ghost World on or on |
| Gladiator |
| F/X heavy Rome Not supposed to be funny but it made me laugh. |
| by Rachel |
| Gladiator on or on |
| Hamlet |
| Ethan as the Dane, I kept myself awake by biting my own hand. |
| by Rachel |
| Hamlet on or on |
| Harold & Maude |
| Suicidal Boy, Crazy Old Dame. "If you want to sing out, sing out." |
| by bellamy |
| Harold & Maude on |
| Head of State |
| The biggest shock? Not a black man in the white house, but -- Chris Rock sincere. |
| by bellamy |
| Hamlet on or on |
| Heartbreakers |
| I am embarrassed. Jason Lee is my excuse for seeing this crap |
| by Rachel |
| Heartbreakers on or on |
| High Fidelity |
| Thoughtful Gen-x flick made me wonder to myself "Where's *my* John Cusak?" |
| by Rachel |
| High Fidelity on or on |
| Holes |
| No chance to poke holes. Too satisfying. Splendid circularities. |
| by bellamy |
| Holes on |
| Hollow Man |
| Science goes awry. Special F/X are the star. A hollow movie. |
| by Rachel |
| Hollow Man on or on |
| The House of Mirth |
| Scully's bold triumph. Beauty eludes people's grasp, and they destroy it. |
| by Rachel |
| House of Mirth on or on |
| House of 1000 Corpses |
| Carnie evil, add a touch of Rocky (Horror). Stir with a chainsaw. |
| by bellamy |
| House of 1000 Corpses on |
| Identity |
| Ten Little Injuns, served with a twist. Creeping chills. It keeps you guessing. |
| by bellamy |
| Identity on |
| Immortal Beloved |
| Beethoven's sadness. The beauty of his music. A masterful work. |
| by bellamy |
| Immortal Beloved on |
| Jackass |
| laugh, gasp, scream, gag, OW! some unwatchable moments oh my god. funny |
| by Rachel |
| Jackass on or on |
| Johnny Mnemonic |
| dolphin mastermind human data couriers keanu sucks ass |
| by Joe |
| Johnny Mnemonic on or on |
| Kate & Leopold |
| Hugh Jackman's, dashing. Meg Ryan's, just annoying. Fast forward the bitch. |
| by bellamy |
| Kate & Leopold on |
| Lara Croft: Tomb Raider |
| Why do they try to blame the Illuminati? It's Hollywood's fault! |
| by Rachel |
| Lara Croft: Tomb Raider on or on |
| Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels |
| New Brit fab foursome, Ganja, guns, Hatchet Harry Keep your "pies" open! |
| by Cathy |
| Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels on or on |
| Man on the Moon |
| In this comic's work Life and art and death converge. Laugh or cry? Do both. |
| by Rachel |
| Man on the Moon on or on |
| The Matrix Reloaded |
| The F/X attack The twisty logic gets flack The hero can't act |
| by Rachel |
| The Matrix Reloaded on |
| Meet the Parents |
| The film was good but, not much left to discover after the trailer. |
| by Rachel |
| Meet the Parents on or on |
| Memento |
| Sticks with you for days This wicked, brilliant film noir With its backwards twist |
| by Rachel |
| Memento or on |
| Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil |
| The seamier side of the old elegant South. Come join the party. |
| by bellamy |
| Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil on |
| Moulin Rouge |
| Ewan smiles and sings "This story is about Love" What more could I want? |
| by Rachel |
| Moulin Rouge or on |
| Mulholland Drive | ||
| Dream-like, it has no beginning, middle, or end. A dizzy spiral. |
Real? Fantasy? Who's? Is anything what it seems? Who are these people? |
|
| by Rachel | by Ceil (a.k.a Mom) | |
| Mulholland Drive or on | ||
| Naked World |
| Nude bodies lay bare Powerful human spirits All over the globe |
| by Rachel |
| Naked World on or on |
| Nurse Betty |
| Soap opera fan pretty much loses her mind. Creepy fantasy. |
| by Rachel |
| Nurse Betty on or on |
| O Brother, Where Art Thou? |
| Slow mocking torture insults us for seeing it Coens let me down |
| by Rachel |
| O Brother, Where Art Thou? on or on |
| Phantom Menace |
| What was the worst part? Jar-Jar? Dull sub-plot? Lame kid? Ewan's never nude. |
| by Rachel |
| Phantom Menace on or on |
| The Princess Bride |
| Giants! Pirates! Love! How could you not enjoy this? Inconceivable! |
| by bellamy |
| The Princess Bride on or on |
| Psycho Beach Party |
| Campy surfer spoof. The sublimated sex themes come to the surface. |
| by Rachel |
| Psycho Beach Party on |
| Quills |
| How does this tale of moral ambiguity reflect your own soul? |
| by Rachel |
| Quills on or on |
| Rabbit Proof Fence |
| A thoughtful journey across a harsh environ. Much inside yourself. |
| by bellamy |
| Rabbit Proof Fence on |
| The Razor's Edge |
| Bill Murray goes to India, finds Nirvana. No, seriously. |
| by bellamy |
| The Razor's Edge on |
| Requiem for a Dream | ||
| Harrowing drug story, more soul-crushing than squeamish. It took me by surprise. |
Three young drug users Addiction leads to bad things Harry loses arm. |
|
| by Rachel | by andrew kerstine | |
| Requiem for a Dream on or on | ||
| Roxanne |
| Romance, delayed. Steve Martin takes Darryl Hannah by a Cyranose. |
| by bellamy |
| Roxanne on |
| The Ruling Class |
| Peter O'Toole, God? The comedy is so black. The Ripper's name, Jack. |
| by bellamy |
| The Ruling Class on |
| Serendipity |
| Clever, bumpy start on this sugary joy ride, but "Movie Fate" drives. |
| by Rachel |
| Serendipity on or on |
| Series 7 |
| Uncanny send-up asks Reality TV "How far will you go?" |
| by Rachel |
| Series 7 on or on |
| Shakespeare in Love |
| Unrelentingly romantic: Gwyneth, Joe Fiennes. "Twas the nightingale!" |
| by bellamy |
| Shakespeare in Love on or on |
| Shaolin Soccer |
| Mythical action Hilarious champions Really can't be beat |
| by Rachel |
| Shaolin Soccer on or on |
| The Shape of Things |
| Moments of laughter Women can be evil too Does that make it art? |
| by Rachel |
| The Shape of Things on or on |
| Showgirls |
| Watching a train wreck into exploitation film -- cannot look away! |
| by bellamy |
| Showgirls on or on |
| Snatch |
| Gritty but stylish Boxing mishaps, heist gone wrong Guy does it again! |
| by Rachel |
| Snatch on or on |
| Someone Like You |
| Yeah it's a chick-flick, but my "erotic nose-brain" found it quite funny |
| by Rachel |
| Someone Like You or on |
| Spun |
| I'm spun on Jason I can stop at any time. Still dizzy. Please stop. |
| by Jinners |
| Spun on or on |
| Startup.com |
| High drama abounds in this dot.umentary So current, so true |
| by Rachel |
| Startup.com on or on |
| Style Wars |
| Hip-hop style was born Grafitti, breaks, and music Bombing the system |
| by Rachel |
| Style Wars on or on |
| Sunset Boulevard |
| Yesterday's star, mad. Mansion, butler, writer all ready for closeups. |
| by bellamy |
| Sunset Boulevard on or on |
| 10 Things I Hate About You |
| "Taming of the Shrew" - something borrowed, something new. The classics still work! |
| by bellamy |
| 10 Things on or on |
| 28 Days Later |
| Basic zombie plot But that doesn't stop it from Scaring your pants off |
| by Rachel |
| 28 Days Later on or on |
| Unbreakable |
| Kitschy follow-up dragged from plot point to plot point kicking and screaming. |
| by Rachel |
| Unbreakable on or on |
| The Virgin Suicides |
| Stifling family. Moody, poignant fantasy. What's a girl to do? |
| by Rachel |
| Virgin Suicides on or on |
| The Way of the Gun |
| Smart southwest crime flick. Novice thugs stumble into family affair. |
| by Rachel |
| Way of the Gun on or on |
| Whale Rider |
| Young. Strong. Brave. A girl gentley nudges tradition to prove she can lead |
| by Rachel |
| Whale Rider on or on |
| What Women Want |
| This man wants a plot, laughs, even psychology; not this formula. |
| by Alex H. |
| What Women Want on or on |
| Windtalkers |
| Nick Cage shakes, takes the White Man's Burden on his back. Poor, weak Indians. |
| by bellamy |
| Windtalkers on or on |
| X-Men |
| Low expectations from superheo movies? This one doesn't suck! |
| by Rachel |
| X-Men on or on |
| X2 |
| The mutants eXcel Always leave you wanting more Hooray, fuzzy elf! |
| by Rachel |
| X2 on |
| XXX |
| Extreme eye candy. Action, action everywhere, but no sense to drink. |
| by bellamy |
| XXX on |
| Yi-Yi |
| Lovingly explores the themes that give life meaning. Three hours well spent. |
| by Rachel |
| Yi-Yi on or on |
| You Can Count On Me |
| A tale of siblings Brilliant, reflective, and true The pace of real life |
| by Rachel |
| You Can Count On Me on or on |
Pretty simple, right? So send your movie review haikus to me at mirka23@flash.net!
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This page last updated on 26 May 2003.
This page has been viewed times since 7 December 2000.